Places of freedom or entrapment? Black adolescent girls’ school experiences

Abstract Though research on Black adolescent girls is growing, their lived school experiences have been largely overlooked. In order for schools to effectively provide equitable opportunities and support students’ well-being, the experiences of marginalized students must be more deeply understood. This study foregrounds Black adolescent girls by exploring how five high school students make meaning of their lived school experiences. During one-on-one sessions, participants responded to a brief questionnaire, followed by a narrative prompt and a semi-structured interview where they were asked to share and reflect on their K-12 school history. The data was analyzed through interpretative phenomenological analysis, resulting in five superordinate themes: (1) A lack of support; (2) Put in a box; (3) Recognizing division and othering; (4) Trying to fit in; and (5) Finding community and a sense of self. The findings can inform both policy and practice to improve educational opportunities and student well-being.


Introduction
Schools function specifically to support the growth of their students, yet the subjective school experiences of students are often overlooked.For educators to equitably and effectively serve students, we must be asking how students experience school and what their experiences mean to them and their future.Moreover, we must explore the unique experiences of students who have been marginalized by society, such as Black adolescent girls.Research on the lived experiences of Black 1 students is scarce (St. Mary et al., 2018), but what does exist typically focuses on Black students in general, comparisons between racial groups, or the male experience (Neal-Jackson, 2018;Young, 2020).Through a content analysis of literature published in high-impact education journals between 2000 and 2015, Young (2020) found 295 articles focusing on Black males, whereas only 72 articles centered Black females.This supports Crenshaw et al. (2015) claim that when it comes to research on the lives of Black girls, there is a "knowledge desert," (p. 6).
Though research specifically looking into the lived K-12 school experiences of Black adolescent girls is growing (see Carter Andrews et al., 2019;McPherson, 2020;Nunn, 2018), a large portion of this research centers disciplinary patterns, the negative stereotypes Black girls face in school, levels of achievement, and other people's perceptions of Black girls (see Anderson & Martin, 2018;Annamma et al., 2019;Edwards, 2020;Epstein et al., 2017;Gibbs Grey & Harrison, 2020).While this research is important, there is a need for more research that captures Black adolescent girls' experiences-the good and the bad-from their perspective.By doing so, we can start to break down the hegemonic White narrative of schooling, while also presenting experiences unique to Black adolescent girls.Therefore, this research aims to provide insight into the lived experiences of five Black adolescent girls in the United States by exploring their K-12 school history.

Black adolescent girls: intersectionality and schooling
Identity is not singular, just as forms of discrimination, subordination and disadvantage do not occur along one axis (Crenshaw, 1989).In 1903 W.E.B Du Bois (2007) introduced the term double consciousness, which is the idea that Black Americans 2 always feel a sense of "twoness," where their blackness and Americanness conflict.Scholars later argued that Black women and girls have a third lens or multiple consciousness: the feminine lens (King, 1988;Welang, 2018).Black women and girls in the United States occupy a "both/and" position, situated both with and apart from Black men and other women (Collins, 2000; see also Muhammad & Haddix, 2016).Due to this positioning, Black American girls view the world-and their place in the world-differently from other groups (e.g.Asian American girls, Black American boys, etc.), and they also encounter different forms of oppression due to their intersecting identities.
Coined by Kimberl e Crenshaw in 1989, intersectionality helps us understand the complexity of the world, people's experiences, and the organization of power by recognizing the ways in which many axes "work together and influence each other," (Collins & Bilge, 2016, p. 11).It informs our understanding of inequity because through an intersectional lens, "oppression and privilege by race, ethnicity, gender, sexual orientation, class, nationality, and so on do not act independently of each other … instead, each kind of oppression or privilege is shaped by and works through the others," (Garry, 2011, p. 827).Thus, when considering students' school experiences, researchers and educators must consider how school systems function to privilege or disadvantage different groups of students, such as Black adolescent girls.
Researchers have documented the numerous ways school systems disadvantage Black students, including biased tracking, a Eurocentric curriculum, and between-school segregation (Walsemann & Bell, 2010;Zamudio et al., 2011).Black girls experience these racist systems in addition to gendered-racism, which refers to specific forms of oppression (e.g.sexual violence, negative relationships with teachers, biased policies) they face due to the intersection of their race and gender (Crenshaw et al., 2015;Morris, 2016;Nunn, 2018).Research demonstrates how schools are often dehumanizing and silencing places for Black girls (Gibbs Grey & Harrison, 2020;McPherson, 2020;Nunn, 2018).Through adultification, Black girlhood is erased, meaning Black girls' behavior is often associated with stereotypes linked to adult Black women (Epstein et al., 2017).Rather than viewing negative behavior in school as immature and child-like, educators often perceive Black girls as hypersexual, loud, aggressive, and less innocent and feminine than other girls (Carter Andrews et al., 2019;Epstein et al., 2017).Exposure to these stereotypes, as well as the threat of exposure, pose a risk to Black girls' psychological well-being and academic performance (Anderson & Martin, 2018).Specifically, a direct result of adultification and the related stereotypes is the disproportionate rate (and harshness) at which Black girls are disciplined in school (Annamma et al., 2019;Epstein et al., 2017;Morris, 2016).Inevitably, these negative experiences cause Black girls to distrust the system and consequently remain silent when facing discrimination (McPherson, 2020).
As presented, Black adolescent girls have unique experiences and perspectives that must be more fully explored.The choice to research Black adolescent girls is based on our understanding of identity and the role identity plays in school experiences, as well as the belief that improving school experiences for the general population requires a recognition of multiple perspectives.The goal of this research is to explore the participants' experiences and perspectives as Black girls who are also part of the student population.Therefore, we chose to use interpretative phenomenological analysis (IPA) to answer the following research questions: How do Black adolescent girls make sense of their K-12 school experiences?How do Black adolescent girls describe their identity in relation to their K-12 school experiences?

Method
IPA is an inductive qualitative approach informed by three key theoretical underpinnings: phenomenology, hermeneutics, and idiography (Smith et al., 2009).IPA involves the double hermeneutic process: researchers seek to understand how participants make sense of a given phenomenon through interpretation (Smith et al., 2009).The researcher is interested in the particular, moving from individual, detailed claims to more general claims that contextualize the experience and draw connections to existing literature (Smith et al., 2009).IPA influences the entire research process, from data collection to reporting.It requires purposeful selection of a single participant, or a small homogeneous group, for researchers to conduct an in-depth analysis examining both convergence and divergence (Smith et al., 2009).Because of its roots in psychology, IPA research is often concerned with identity (Smith, 2004), making it a credible method for examining the lived school experiences of Black adolescent girls.Furthermore, IPA aligns with Black feminist epistemology given that lived experiences are understood as a credible form of knowledge, and an emphasis is placed on individuality whilst acknowledging collective challenges (Collins, 2000;Muhammad & Haddix, 2016).
Using IPA to explore Black girls' particular school experiences allows for theoretical generalizability, meaning educators can draw connections between the research findings and their practice (Smith et al., 2009), and these findings can "effectively migrate from one site of study to other social locations," (Fine & Torre, 2004, p. 29).IPA provides a unique lens into the more subtle, "deeper social dynamics," (Dyer & Wilkins, 1991, p. 615) that quantitative or large-scale research may miss in an effort to find commonalities between entire populations (Oxley, 2016).Thus, by understanding the complexity of Black girls' experiences, educators can better support individual growth, well-being and provide students equitable opportunities.

Participants and research context
Purposive sampling was used to select students who attended Norchester High School (NHS), a public school in a Northeastern U.S. suburb.Students could participate if they identified as Black or African American girls, and were in 11th or 12th grade.We chose to focus the research on students near the end of high school in order for them to be able to reflect on their K-12 experience, while also considering the role school has played in shaping their future goals.Moreover, three students involved in this study (Shandra, Esther, and Jocelyn) were born outside of the United States, but each emigrated between the ages of five and seven.The immigration history of the other two participants was less clear: Amanda is a daughter of immigrants, and English is Lucia's second language.Table 1 presents the profile of each participant, including their age, words they use to describe themselves, and words they use to describe school.
According to the district website, at the time of data collection (fall 2019) NHS had nearly 2000 students, with Black students making up <6% of the student body.The majority of staff and students at NHS were White (>96% and >76%, respectively), and there were no full-time Black teachers.Though this data is relevant to the stories the students told about their high school experience, it does not reflect earlier school contexts.The Norchester school district has eight elementary schools, two middle schools, and one high school, and several students experienced other school districts.There were other aspects of the girls' identities and experiences we did not control for, such as class, academic ability, and teachers they had.Controlling for these factors would have been difficult due to the small Black population within NHS.Furthermore, the participants naturally reflected on these factors when sharing their stories, providing insight into the ways in which their experiences differed due to unique circumstances.

Data collection
Data for this study was collected as part of a larger project looking at Black students' school experiences and teachers' perspectives on race in majority-White schools; therefore, the choice in school district made sense for our overarching project aims.Prior to data collection, we obtained approval from the authors' institutional review board, approval from the public school district's assistant superintendent, written and verbal assent from participants, and written consent from a parent or guardian.We also removed any personally identifiable information and took adequate measures to protect participants' confidentiality, including using pseudonyms for places and people.
Students individually met with the first author in a quiet space at NHS for a one-hour scheduled session consisting of three parts: a questionnaire, a narrative, and a semi-structured interview.The questionnaire involved both qualitative and quantitative data, but for the purposes of this study we are only using the qualitative data.The first author developed the research instruments for this study based on feedback from the second author, as well as a diverse group of educational researchers.
Each session began with the questionnaire, the responses of which are presented in Table 1.The first open-ended question asked students to list three to five words that describe their school experience, and then they were asked to elaborate on the word that best describes it.They were then asked to share how they identify themselves.Students could put a star next to any question they did not want to discuss further.
Following the questionnaire, students orally shared a narrative about their K-12 school experience.Prior to the session, students were given the narrative prompt (Appendix A), providing them the opportunity to contemplate and/or prepare their narrative ahead of time.IPA studies typically use semi-structured interviews, but some participants need more guidance from the interviewer or other forms to express themselves (Gauntlett et al., 2017;Smith, 2004).Thus, the questionnaire and introductory narrative provided different avenues for participants to express themselves.
The oral narrative transitioned into the semi-structured interview once students had finished telling their story.The narrative and interview were both audio recorded, and lasted between 29 and 50 minutes (M ¼ 38).Many of the interview questions stemmed from the questionnaire responses and narrative, but the first author also asked questions to gain insight into students' goals, opportunities provided in school, what students would change about their school, how students perceive the adults in school, and the school's racial composition.Students were not specifically asked about gender discrimination, but they were asked about racial discrimination, which could have tilted their responses to be more focused on race.Nevertheless, they perceive their experiences through the lens of both their racial and gender identity, meaning their stories reflect this intersecting positionality (Collins, 2000).

Data analysis
After transcribing the interviews verbatim, I, the first author, followed the IPA steps outlined by Smith et al. (2009).First, I listened to, read, and re-read one transcript before handwriting exploratory notes, which included descriptive, linguistic, and conceptual comments.I then transferred the comments and notes to Microsoft Word 2016 where I reviewed everything before developing emergent themes.These themes were combined into a master list where I looked for patterns and connections between them.The process was then repeated with the other four transcripts, after which I reviewed all themes and drew connections across cases.The second author audited the entire research process to ensure credibility (Smith et al., 2009), referring to Smith's (2011) guide for evaluating quality in IPA research and Yardley's (2000) guide for evaluating qualitative research.The audit does not require absolute consensus between first and second author but ensures the reported account is plausible, transparent, and systematic (Smith et al., 2009).

Researchers' position
The first author of this study identifies as a White woman, and the second author identifies as a Black man; thus, we recognize that we may not fully understand the students' raced-gendered experiences.However, through our collective experiences and positions as educators, we strongly believe we have provided a credible interpretation of the data.We recognize that as the interviewer, the first author's identity, including differences in power between researcher and student, could have affected students' responses.To mediate this, we engaged in reflexivity by reviewing and discussing the students' responses in relation to the first author.Furthermore, by recognizing power differences between ourselves and the participants, we present the results using the students' language as much as possible, rather than academic language that "often expresses values and understandings held by white, male, 'scientific' culture" (Standing, 1998, p. 10).

Results
The analysis resulted in five superordinate themes: (1) A lack of support; (2) Put in a box; (3) Recognizing division and othering; (4) Trying to fit in; and (5) Finding community and a sense of self.These themes represent a tension in that schools provoke both feelings of entrapment and freedom for students.The prevalence of themes are presented in Appendix Table B1.

A lack of support
Students reported times when "[their] friends were not [their] friends," (Amanda), they were not given care or respect, and they were not listened to or believed.Lucia and Esther both reflected on experiences where their friends' use of racial slurs and general lack of racial understanding made it hard to call them friends.Lucia explained, I have this one girl and like she claims she's my friend, but I really don't feel like it … she'll always like make excuses and she'll be like, 'Oh like you're too loud, like you're too ghetto or you're too ratchet.' Navigating adolescent relationships can be confusing, but for these students, the lack of understanding friends had about race was an additional hurdle.This causes them to question how they can be friends with someone who does not respect them or provide them support, but instead uses derogatory words to add to their pain.
White peers in general frequently used the N-word, mostly in a joking or casual manner-as if entitled to use it-without recognition for how it made Black students feel.When Shandra was called the N-word by a peer, she initially "let it slide" because "it was supposed to be a joke."However, the next time it happened she reported the incident to the dean, whose reaction surprised her: "he kind of didn't believe me.And I didn't know why I was like, 'why would I be lying?'"Instead, the dean listened to the offender and other kids who denied the incident had occurred.Even though Shandra saw this as an isolated incident and perceived administration as fair overall, the lack of support from the school pushed her to be more self-reliant.Though becoming more self-reliant can be viewed as a positive, students should be able to turn to their school for support.
Lucia took a more critical stance toward administration, pointing to a general lack of understanding "minority kids:" I wish administration was just better with dealing with the problems of the minority kids.Cause it's like we don't have a voice like ever, like it just doesn't-like, we don't matter apparently … I wish they had somebody on the board that was maybe a minority that could understand it … yes, I know [Norchester] is mainly White.Like I understand like that's a big factor, but there are still minorities that go here and we matter too and we should be noticed.
Lucia tried on multiple occasions to talk to administration, whether about practice space for a club "full of minorities" she was in, or mistreatment from a teacher, but "they did nothing."The literal lack of space her club received compounded her feelings of irrelevance in school; Lucia felt unheard, unrecognized, and unrepresented.
These feelings also emerged from experiences with two of her teachers, who she identified as racist, and who caused her to have "mental breakdowns."NHS has pathways students can choose from based on their interests, and Lucia was initially excited about her choice and motivated to succeed because of the qualifications she could leave high school with.Unfortunately, Ms. Brandy and Ms. Lowe were teachers in Lucia's track, and similar to the administration, they acted as barriers to her success.At one point, Lucia was trying to comfort a friend and Ms. Brandy "threatened" to take away her practice hours, a requirement for the course: I ended up having a really bad anxiety attack … I don't cry.I don't ever cry.Like, I try not to.But I, she had me in tears, I felt like my like, throat was closing, I could not breathe and it was just so bad and just.And like, I had warnings from other people like other people would always tell me like Ms. [Brandy] … she's racist like, constantly, … I just didn't believe it until I saw it and I realized that she was.
Through this excerpt Lucia reveals the power these teachers had over her emotions, her daily experiences in school, and her future.The physical effect of her throat closing demonstrates feelings of silencing and entrapment from school.The excerpt also reflects Lucia's constant need to prove her experience is real; she uses others' statements to validate her own claims, as if her own experience is not proof enough.
For Jocelyn, her teachers' lack of compassion was one reason she started therapy.She explained, "Um sophomore year was [pause] atrocious.… just school was very infuriating and stressful.Just like the workload and teachers they just they don't care about slowing down or stopping."Thankfully, Jocelyn was able to turn to her guidance counselor who did provide support and was the one who recommended she try therapy.Though the students were sometimes able to find people who supported them, feelings of betrayal from friends, as well as barriers created by adults, were solidified in the girls' memories and detracted from their overall school experience.

Put in a box
The students' stories often depicted feelings of entrapment due to the formation of categories in school, others' assumptions and misperceptions, and pressure from academic expectations.As "a mixed kid," the labels placed on Jocelyn fluctuated depending on context: Um so when I went to my school with more predominantly um minority kids they thought I was gentrified and that I was too White to be in their building.But then when I was in elementary school, they thought that I was more of like a Black kid.
Rather than being accepted and able to fit into a group, Jocelyn was always too much of the wrong race, whereas other students could not escape Black girl stereotypes.
Lucia worked hard to overcome being stereotyped as "ghetto" and "loud," but this was especially difficult in middle school when everyone got placed on teams that were named by colors.Some students, including Lucia, came up with different names to represent how they perceived the groups: So the um, the gold team, was like the athletes.The maroon team, … they were just kind of like, the nobodies, I guess you could say.Um, the white team, were all the brainiacs.The red team, were all the rich kids.And the blue team, were all the bad kids.
The grouping sent a clear message: Lucia was placed on the blue team, along with many other Black or "bad" students, whereas only a couple of the smartest Black students were placed on the white team.This incident was one of many where Lucia could not escape others' misperceptions that she was bad.
Lucia felt people who know her understand she is hyperactive and likes to overtly express happiness, but her actions were often misinterpreted as disruptive.This perception carries over into the club that she was a part of: Like they see us and like we come in and like we look disorganized and we look like what they're thinking that we are, you know what I mean?And it just sucks because like we're so much more than that.
Lucia sensed NHS did not value what they were doing.Instead, they had a preconceived idea of who they were, and only saw them through that negative lens, a lens the students could not escape no matter what they tried.It was evident throughout Lucia's interview that she simply wanted to be seen-to be recognized-for who she was: a good, talented person.
In contrast, Amanda felt, "99% of the teachers and staff … [were] good," and would "take you as you," but she did witness a couple who were "questionable."For instance, one teacher "dumb[ed] down the way she talk[ed]" to one of Amanda's friends because of her "thick accent."Even though Amanda's friend is smart, the teacher made false assumptions about her comprehension due to her accent.Unlike her friend, Amanda was identified as "bright" early on.Her label was visible to others as evidenced by close friends who made comments about how she was often placed at the "smart table," and in high school she was always in the same classes as the top 5% of her grade.As she put it, "here whe-whe when you're smart, you're smart."However, having this label created certain restrictions with her friends: "I-I'm not supposed to feel like the struggles they do." All labels or categories these students were given, in a sense, trapped them.As Amanda explained, schools are "very into like categorizing," meaning, "there's less freedom in-at-in your education, or choice to do-to learn things, if you don't fit into certain categories."She wished students had more "wiggle room," where they were free from these categories and able to decide their own path.At the same time, Amanda was trapped by high expectations because of pressure she placed on herself and feeling she had to live up to the label of bright.For instance, getting her first B in class, combined with her own pressure to be perfect, had a negative effect on her overall well-being: The environment around education that's when everyone started taking like grades seriously.And I think, just like the rhetoric around that caused me [inaudible] to start like being anxious about school.Um, and so like, I was in this cycle-that's when my cycle started of like procrastinating school work and then getting anxious about it so I'd stay up all night doing it and then like I have no sleep.And then throughout school I wasn't paying attention cause I was sleep deprived and that kind of like continued into high school.
Even though she did well academically, she found herself in a "kind of … rollercoaster" where she was never fully satisfied, rather she always found new areas she had to improve.She called this "my cycle," as this negative mental rollercoaster had become a part of her.
Despite being a good student, Amanda was not immune to being misunderstood.Amanda recalled first noticing teachers' wrongful assumptions in middle school.One instance with a teacher really stood out: The first day she gave us books, I forgot to bring it in the next day, and she she kind of like.I want to assume because I forgot the book she was like, 'Oh, you're going to be one of those students.'And it was like, on the progress report, she was like, 'needs to put more effort into class.'But I was like, I was participating, I was reading to the class every day, I was answering her questions, I was bringing in the homework.It, it just kinda threw me off.
Amanda knew she was a good student, but her teacher-someone with power over her future-did not see her that way.Amanda "want[ed] to assume" this misunderstanding arose because she initially forgot the book, but the unspoken implication is there could be other discriminatory beliefs driving this misunderstanding.Being labeled and pre-judged is frustrating when who we are does not align with how others perceive us.This frustration is amplified when dealing with power differentials, and it leads to feelings of entrapment.

Recognizing division and othering
Students spoke of times they were made to feel different, recognized disadvantages, and frequently compared themselves to others due to their acute awareness of social division and hierarchies.Feelings of difference strongly affected Jocelyn: one reason she felt really angry in elementary school was because she was racially and linguistically different.When she was young, her "English was kind of sketchy, kind of rough," but then she was put in a language class "that kind of completely got rid of" her native language.In a sense, the class erased part of her identity, making it hard to communicate with her extended family.
To Shandra, feeling different was based on individual differences, by having her "own style," "own way of speaking" and "own life path."Even though Shandra appeared mostly unphased by racial differences, she did experience discomfort when she first became aware of racialization: Back then I just took it as nobody likes me and, I didn't understand why either I didn't-I didn't really think it was cause of my skin color cause, like I said, kids don't really know much.But as I got into about like middle school I started realizing that maybe it is cause of my skin color.But I didn't hate myself for it and I didn't hate them for it either.I just thought that they, they didn't know that just because I'm darker than you does not mean that I'm any different.Shandra's growing awareness of race stemmed from moments of othering.She developed a realization that race could divide people, but she saw this division and othering more as a result of ignorance than malintent.
Esther had a similar reflection when topics such as slavery were discussed: So uh a lot of the kids would always like, look at me because I was Black.And I was like, okay, I understand now that it was all the influence of like, we're children.So I can't blame it on anyone because again, we're children.We don't know yet.
Both Esther and Shandra experienced moments of othering, yet they forgave their peers' ignorance.Over time, the students mostly learned to accept and live with the lack of diversity and overall racial understanding at NHS; yet, it was through these experiences of othering and division that the girls grew in their own understanding of race.
Although the students were accustomed to being the "minority" race, Amanda and Esther felt it was "awkward" (Esther) being the only Black students in their honors classes.Amanda acknowledged that race was not the "only factor that ma[d]e [her] belong," but sometimes "certain things [didn't] apply to [her]."For instance, as a daughter of immigrants, Amanda was motivated to do well because "the attributes to being an immigrant in this country [were] very like showing towards them."Amanda recognized the disadvantages of being an immigrant, but she was hesitant to describe what it meant for most of her peers to come from successful, non-immigrant lines: [pause] I don't want to use the word privilege, I'm not gonna use the word privilege, but there's some like [pause], you definitely start at a different place being a different race.
Amanda chose her words carefully during her interview, remaining somewhat neutral and frequently pausing to think before she spoke.Her refusal to use the word "privilege" could be due to her having learned to be passive in order to succeed (see Trying to fit in) or because of the first author's identity as a White person.Nevertheless, she recognized that her starting position in life was not equivalent to her White, non-immigrant peers, which contributed to pressure she placed on herself to succeed.
As a high-achiever, academic success was a prominent area of division for Amanda.She frequently discussed her academic success in relation to her peers: "I'm doing well compared to my class, I'm, high high up there."Amanda did not present her success in order to brag, but more because she valued academic success, and she found validation in doing well compared to her peers.However, because of her comparative mindset, she created a slippery mental rollercoaster, wanting to remain at the highest point, but unable to, and eventually falling into a negative emotional cycle (as discussed under Put in a box).
By viewing things through a comparative lens, the students struggled to find satisfaction within themselves.Instead, they viewed themselves in relation to others based on haves and have nots.Lucia framed her experiences by comparing them to the very different, better experiences of White girls: We're asking for uniforms this year and we still haven't gotten it yet.And the cheer team, just full of all White people, have gotten it.
I could ask a question in class and she'll yell at me for asking questions.But then like one of the White girls in the class asks a question and she like makes a little joke about it.
Through this comparative framing, Lucia illustrates the ways in which school functions as a site of division and unequal treatment.Even though she often spoke of race, Lucia also attributed differences to money.When Lucia first got into middle school she realized, I was treated differently.And like I didn't get the same opportunities as maybe say like the rich kids in my school.And it wasn't like, mainly about them being White, it was mainly about like, you know, like, Oh they have money or they are higher they like live better lives … or they're like a higher up in like education than me, like they're smarter than me.
The intersection of class and race as factors of division was visible to Lucia.She drew a connection between whiteness and wealth, and realized this combination positions people as "higher up" because they have access to opportunities that are unavailable to Lucia.
Jocelyn also made comparisons related to race, but instead of comparing her personal experiences to others, she made more objective comparisons about systemic inequity, such as White and Black representation in the curriculum, and differing school quality.Through firsthand experience she noticed that, compared to NHS, teachers at more "urban" schools were less qualified and schoolwork lacked rigor.These noted differences within and between schools leads to disadvantages for certain populations, but regardless of school, disadvantages exist for the students simply from being Black girls in the United States: I feel like if we were going to rank people on a ladder, a Black woman falls at the very bottom.Like it goes, you know, men obviously, obviously are always on top.It always goes men, White men.Um, um and then I think maybe like Black men and White women are next to each other and then Black women are-are at the very bottom.(Jocelyn) Even though Jocelyn is mixed, she claimed to "have more predominantly Black features," placing her at the bottom of the ladder.She emphasized men's advantages by using words, such as "obviously, obviously … always … always," though she then clarified that by "men," she meant White men.As Black girls, structural inequities were obvious and explicit, affecting their schooling and everyday experiences.The frequent comparisons-whether based on wealth, race, ability, immigration, or gender-reflect a collective race consciousness that these girls develop, despite their many individual differences in background, personality, and experience.

Trying to fit in
The students developed strategies to fit in and succeed, including being passive and molding themselves to others.Shandra attributed her success with teachers to the fact that when in class she was quiet, or in "learning mode," thus she "never had any problems."Similarly, Amanda's friend who was treated like a "baby" by their teacher," was not "vocal" about the treatment because she was "committed to passing."Amanda's own desire to maintain her good student image affected how she presented herself.She was typically in classes with the top students, and she noticed other students never asked questions: And then kind of just like, maybe like, not peer pressure but like [pause] like, 'Oh, I can't ask questions so I'm just going to stay confused' and then I'll get upset because like I'm not satisfied with my test scores.
Asking questions would reveal a weakness: it would make her appear less knowledgeable than her mostly White and often mostly male peers.Although self-described as "not sociable," she still worked to blend in by remaining quiet at the cost of her scores and inevitably her well-being.
In Jocelyn's case, her attempts "to be someone [she] wasn't" caused her to become suicidal.She started losing hair, isolating herself, and rarely slept.Eventually, she switched schools and things became somewhat better when she finally got friends.However, she viewed herself as "a public servant," always trying to please others and switching her mood or interests based on who she was speaking to.She actively learned what those around her liked and then researched it in order to have something in common with them.She never talked to her friends about her feelings or told them when she had a bad day because she did not want to put that stress on them.Instead she explained, "You know sometimes I feel like a chameleon cause, kind of just [pause].I don't know like mold myself to like, fit."Not only does she alter her personality, but she dies her naturally red hair black in order to "seem, more normal."As there did not seem to be a place for mixed kids, she tried to get as close to one identity as possible by accentuating her blackness.
Lucia, on the other hand, tried to separate herself from her identity during class.She learned "from a young age to act a certain way" to fight the stigma that came with being Black.Thus she had worked hard to "calm [her]self down," "nod [her] head," "close [her] mouth," and "just kind of stay in [her] lane and like know [her] place."Despite her efforts, she had problems with numerous teachers, making her feel "so trapped:" It's like no matter how much I try, like [pause] I'm always going to be viewed like that and there's like nothing that I can change.But like that doesn't mean that I can still like speak out.Like I want to yell at people like there's-I want to hit somebody but like.I know I can't because if I do that then that means they're right.Like I am like this loud and ghetto and ratchet person and like they'll view all Black people like this and that's not what it is.
There was a sense of deep anger and hurt in Lucia's account, but at the same time she appeared defeated.She wanted to fight for herself, "yell at people … hit somebody," but knew that would reinforce the stereotypes placed on her; thus, she remained silent.Although these girls found strategies to succeed, inevitably they were trapped in a box others created.

Finding community and a sense of self
Throughout their school experience, students found ways to resist feelings of entrapment and gain a sense of freedom by supporting themselves, working to remain positive, forming trustworthy and supportive connections, and looking forward to the future.Specifically, they supported themselves through time management, going outside of their comfort zone, knowing their own strengths, and standing up for themselves.For example, when the administration failed to support Shandra against the racist classmate, she took matters into her own hands and dumped water on the boy.This made her realize, "wow I can like stick up for myself I don't need anyone."The incident also made Shandra find confidence, autonomy, and strength to "get rid" of people who were "fake," because they were not there for her when she needed them most.
Both Shandra and Esther chose to have positive mindsets, which helped them navigate their experiences in and out of school.For instance, when asked whether they had experienced discrimination outside of school, they responded: I mean I experience like grumpy people.But I don't-I don't ever think oh it's because of my skin color.I feel like that's ignorant.(Shandra) I can't say I faced too much [discrimination] because people know like, why would you say something to like, someone who has such a positive attitude all the time?So that's why I always try to keep like a positive attitude … I'm not going to like fight you over it but I'm gonna be like, that's not cool.(Esther) Despite both having experienced peers using the N-word, in everyday encounters they chose to give people the benefit of the doubt.Their positive attitudes acted as a defense to any negativity that may present itself.Moreover, they saw themselves as paving the way for other Black students: Shandra liked to think of herself as a model for students to "feel more powerful just being alone," whereas Esther believed her academic success could make the Black community look good.Thus, they liberated themselves from feelings of entrapment by finding strength from within.
None of the participants got to where they were alone; key to all of their experiences were people they related to, could turn to, and who uplifted them.Often, these connections were formed through participation in sports or clubs.Esther and Lucia were in the same club, which they referred to as "our family."They both found support from the club advisor, who Esther described as "open minded, and like you can tell she has like a big heart by the way she acts."At the same time, Lucia appreciated that the club was made up of mostly "minorities:" … since there's very little minority to the school, which means I don't like really get to see them a lot.And like when I do see them I can relate to them, and that's why I love being [in the club] so much is cause like there's full of people like me, there's full of Black people and there's people that, full of people that have dealt with the same situation than me.And that's why I feel like I can like talk to them more.
Lucia often felt surrounded by White people, who at times invalidated her racialized experiences, and she felt trapped by the labels and injustices she faced in school.Thus, she "realized that like [she] needed escapes and [she] found teachers that were helpful," as well as the club, which was a safe space with people to whom she could relate because of their collective racialized experiences.
Even though Lucia found people and places where she felt free to be herself, she still sought to escape the White bubble she grew up in with the hopes things would be different: I'm planning to go into … historically Black colleges and universities.So, I just want a chance to just, cause I grew up in [Norchester], like all my life I've been here and I've just realized it's all White, and I wanted to go out and-first off I want to leave [state] cause I want something new.And I just want to be in a place where there's more people like me.
In a way, she had accepted that she did not fully belong in Norchester, but she believed she would find a sense of community once she got out and could choose the people she surrounded herself with.For these girls, a strong sense of self and/or community helped alleviate feelings of entrapment the school engendered through divisive practices, incidences of racism, and restrictive labels.

Discussion
This research provides insight into the convergence and divergence of school experiences for five Black adolescent girls.The stories they shared only represent a small slice of their overall school experience, but they reveal what moments made an impact, and how they drew meaning from those moments.For these students, schools present both feelings of freedom and entrapment.At one end of the spectrum, schools provide students with opportunities to explore their interests, grow into themselves, and gain necessary life skills.At the other end, schools sustain social hierarchies, hegemonic ways of knowing and being, and rigid expectations that are often grounded in historical gendered-racism.Stemming from a natural desire to belong, the girls found themselves caught between trying to mold themselves to fit into a White-dominated space, whilst also fighting to stay true to themselves.Challenged by wrongful assumptions and stereotypes, success and acceptance often felt distant or came at a cost.
These feelings of entrapment can affect students' feelings of relatedness/belonging, competence, and autonomy.According to self-determination theory (SDT), these are three basic psychological needs that, if left unmet, can result in reduced well-being and intrinsic motivation (Deci & Ryan, 2012).SDT can be used to explain the effect the social environment has on intrinsic motivation by linking environmental factors to basic need satisfacation.When considering classrooms and schools, SDT has been used to observe how various forms of feedback (good and bad) can create an environment that is either autonomy-supportive or controlling (Deci & Ryan, 2012).In this study, SDT relates to the various ways environmental factors, such as racist structures and feedback, affected the students' overall school experiences and psychological needs, as well as the ways students fought back against feelings of powerlessness to find a greater sense of autonomy.
According to Purdie-Vaughns and Eibach's (2008) model of intersectional invisibility, "the challenges associated with misrepresentation, marginalization, and disempowerment will tend to be prominent features of the experience of people with intersectional subordinate-group identities," (p.383).Therefore, it is unsurprising the five girls frequently spoke of the struggle to be recognized, represented, heard, and respected.Yet, in their own way and to differing degrees, each student pushed back against feelings of injustice and skillfully navigated a majority-White high school.In a sense, they all learned how to act in order to be successful and to gain a semblance of control over others' perceptions of themselves, including their competence.This was especially evident with Jocelyn, who did not feel she fit anywhere; thus, she molded herself to whoever she was around, becoming trapped in how she projected herself outwardly at a cost to building genuine connections.
Lucia also worked hard to fit in, but she could not escape feelings of powerlessness stemming from racial and wealth disparities, which distinguish who can (White students, particularly girls) and who cannot (Black students) obtain opportunities.The overwhelming sense of powerlessness and injustice turned into a physical experience of silencing when her teacher caused her to have a panic attack.Despite her efforts to be passive and complacent, conforming to normative femininity, her teacher had a fixed idea of who she was: the loud Black girl (Morris & Perry, 2017).As Morris and Perry (2017) explain, race "appears to heighten perceptions of nonpassive and therefore gender-inappropriate behavior," (p.144).By not successfully conforming to hegemonic ideals of femininity, Lucia received more frequent and harsher punishment than her White peers, and for subjective, non-threatening reasons, corroborating research on school discipline (Crenshaw et al., 2015;Morris, 2016).At the same time, Lucia did not want to be silenced, nor move past the blatant inequity she experienced.On numerous occasions she complained to administration, yet her feelings of frustration were only amplified when her requests were ignored.The apparent contradictions in her behavior reflect the multiplicity of identity: consistent with research on Black girls in school, Lucia adopted strategies to pass while also pushing back against injustices and stereotypes (Anderson, 2020;Henry, 1998).
Similarly, Amanda adopted strategies in order to be successful in classes where she was often the only Black student.By observing her peers, she learned what was expected of a "smart" student, enabling her to avoid the "loud Black girl" stereotype.Unlike Lucia, Amanda was successful because she was naturally reserved, fitting the dominant conception of femininity.Unfortunately, this came at a negative cost to her grades and overall well-being.Research has linked the threat of being judged by stereotypes and confirming those stereotypes to anxiety, underperformance, low self-efficacy, and negative psychological well-being (Anderson & Martin, 2018).Researchers have specifically noted how being identified as gifted can have a strong negative effect on Black girls because of the exposure to negative racial and gender stereotypes (being viewed as intellectually inferior) along with pressure to be the "all-knowing," student (Anderson & Martin, 2018, p. 119).The psychological effects include a fear of failure (sometimes resulting in not completing assignments), being overly self-critical, and often being concerned with how others perceive one's achievement (Anderson & Martin, 2018).Consumed by school expectations and academic standing, Amanda appeared to suffer from the at times paralyzing psychological effect of both perfectionism and stereotype threat (Anderson & Martin, 2018).
Labels, whether related to giftedness or racial stereotypes, are a form of external feedback affecting Black girls' school experiences (Anderson & Martin, 2018).Not only do they create feelings of entrapment by removing one's sense of control over how one is perceived, but they are also a means of comparison and division.However, they are not merely created by individuals, but they are built into social environments, such as schools, where students are tracked and resources are unequally allocated.Despite this, the girls found ways to resist feelings of entrapment by locating spaces and people with whom they were free to be themselves.
Particularly interesting was Esther and Shandra's use of positivity to escape the effect of negative labels and social division; instead, they embraced their individuality and surrounded themselves with positive, supportive people.Their use of cognitive identity management strategies enabled them to avoid the distress that comes with acknowledging one's marginalized status in the system, resulting in higher levels of well-being and a greater sense of control (Bahamondes et al., 2019).

Conclusion
Findings from this study suggest that gendered-racism in school can have a significant psychological effect on Black adolescent girls.In some cases, schools in the United States wittingly or unwittingly continue to engage in practices that marginalize, silence, and dehumanize Black adolescent girls, resulting in inequitable opportunity (Carter Andrews et al., 2019;McPherson, 2020).The findings point to the usefulness of IPA in examining school histories as it reveals complex racial and power dynamics, and it allows for a more nuanced exploration into the ways in which students perceive their school experiences.This research has implications for educational leadership and policy.School leaders must reconsider how students are grouped and labeled in order to be more autonomy-supportive and reduce division and othering.Replacing punitive (biased) disciplinary practices with restorative interventions, and promoting positive student-student and teacher-student relationships is key in creating a more inclusive, healthy environment where students can feel a sense of community whilst developing a positive sense of self (Morris, 2016).Furthermore, schools must provide space to hear the perspectives of marginalized populations (with an intersectional approach) to ensure their needs are not silenced.Finally, the curriculum and staff must be representative of the population, providing identify affirming and empowering experiences for all students (Muhammad & Haddix, 2016).By adopting culturally-and gender-responsive practices, schools can reduce barriers and create safe spaces that are conducive to healthy development (Morris, 2016).Policies can also address representation by supporting the recruitment and retention of teachers of color.
To improve opportunities and support student well-being, research must continue to closely explore the lives of Black adolescent girls in a variety of school contexts.Their experiences as students who are both Black and female can be used to inform school practices in order to create spaces of freedom rather than entrapment.Although the students' stories were told through a Black feminine perspective, their experiences shed light on larger structural issues within schools that create a culture of division, exclusion, and inequity.Therefore, this research also has implications for the overall student population.We implore researchers to continue exploring these issues in order to reconceptualize the ways in which schools are structured.

Table 1 .
Participant details and responses to questionnaire.Text in bold signifies the word students felt best described their school experience.